When you are being abused, the abuser usually tries to do it in a way where if you tried to explain it to someone else then they’d think you’re over reacting. You could tell your friend, “I think my boyfriend is abusive. He puts me down, he tries to control me, and we have been fighting more and more!”. Unless your friend has been in an abusive relationship themselves, they will most likely reply with, “Maybe he’s putting you down on accident? Maybe he’s just a little protective? Every relationship fights every once in a while, maybe you’re hitting a rough patch?”.

And you see, in a normal relationship it’s not automatically unhealthy if you accidentally put each other down once in awhile. It’s not automatically unhealthy if your partner is protective over you and worries over who you’re seeing and what you’re doing. It’s not automatically unhealthy if you have a fight (as long as it’s not physical, and the point of the fight is to solve the problem and not to try to put each other down).

The point where it gets abusive is when it becomes a pattern and when it’s more intense. It is automatically unhealthy when your boyfriend says something negative about everything you are interested in that he isn’t also interested in. It is automatically unhealthy when you need your boyfriend’s permission to see all your friends, to wear certain clothes, to say certain things, and to leave the house. It is  automatically unhealthy if you need to fight for almost every single problem you have. (And in case you’re one of those people who has to make everything about themselves, yes it’s still abusive when a girl does the same thing to her boyfriend)

That’s the thing about Deadworld.

I wouldn’t be suspicious if a couple people were rude to me each day. I wouldn’t be suspicious if sometimes I lost friends. I wouldn’t be suspicious if sometimes people were  upset at me for reasons I don’t understand.

It’s that is happens constantly, and if not then in cycles.

Deadworld is manipulative and abusive, and because of that it will take me much longer to find my way out of here. I’ve already done online research about Deadworld and about people believing they are dead in general (because obviously not everyone is going to call the afterlife “DeadWorld”). Most people who have believed in this were told that they were delusional or depressed.

I’ll continue on my research.

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